Does God Use Online Dating? Win an Answer!

When I worked at Red Lobster, nearly 10 years ago, I met the first person I remember who admitted he was dating online.  I think his name was Paul and he was a server at the restaurant with me.  Poor Paul, was super smart and I thought he was funny and pretty cute, but he just couldn’t seem to get a repeat date.

Suddenly, one night after we had worked together for about one year, Paul bounded into the restaurant lobby, swinging his black, waist apron over his head.  “She said, ‘Yes!'”  A resounding chorus queried, “Who said, ‘Yes,’ about what?!”  We, his fellow servers, couldn’t believe that he meant the obvious.  Where was this mystery woman?  How had they met?  How long had they known each other?  Why had we never seen her?

I confess, when Paul told us he had met Wendy on, I felt sorry for him.  Apparently, he was more desperate than I thought.  I kept my mouth shut and minded my own business, but I wanted to warn him that it could never last.  An online meeting was certainly superficial and a foregone disaster.

Paul and I went separate ways.  I was already engaged, married later that year and moved away.  However, I stayed in touch with another server from Red Lobster and two years later, I heard that Paul and Wendy were happily wedded and expecting a baby girl.  Go figure. 

Since that over 1000 dating websites have launched a volley of Cupid’s arrows.  Surprisingly they have pierced 1 in 5 of couples married today.  Currently, one third of singles are scouring the wide world of cyberspace for that special someone.

Let me give you a few more statistics, taken from Janet Parshal’s interview with Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott.  The Parrotts are the authors of “dot.comdating:  Finding Your Right Someone Online,” and the founders of  I found the timing of this interview especially interesting since Beth just shared with us her experience of waiting on God to provide her husband.  Hopefully, Beth will chime in here, giving us her thoughts about the efficacy of online dating. and are the two most renowned online dating services.  According to a survey conducted by Eharmony, after the first five years of marriage, couples who had met online reported better than average satisfaction in their marriage.

So my first question: Can it last?  At least one source says, “Yes.”

I think the bottom line question for me is: Does online dating somehow usurp God’s sovereignty and express a lack of faith that He will provide in His timing?  Can God’s sovereignty be usurped?

I really am undecided about online dating and curious about your opinion.  Should a Christian try it?  Why or why not?  Have you dated anyone online and what happened?

Here’s the deal.  I am especially interested in your thoughts if you are single.  Leave a comment here and you will be entered in a contest.  I will draw the winning name on June 16th, and the winner will receive a copy of the Parrott’s book, “dot.comdating: Finding Your Right Someone Online.”

Good Luck!

5 thoughts on “Does God Use Online Dating? Win an Answer!

  1. He would probably do, because it’s just so much fun, easier to interact with people instead of “prayer”, lots of interesting and colorful personalities, and the ultimate prize that everyone craves for: an actual loving life partner to share your spare time with, maybe even start a family. I first tried paid membership websites, using an eharmony promotional code to cut down the monthly fee, and just started browsing around and talking to people. After a couple of months I went out with a really cute guy for coffee, and we hit it off to a perfect relationship. We got engaged! 😀

    1. Thanks for your thoughts, Versie. Lots of people agree with you. But I definitely believe prayer is still an integral part of the process!

  2. I am married to the man I met on AND I have a baby girl. 🙂 One of my best friends met her fiance on Eharmony. It’s no different than meeting someone at a softball game, a bar, or even church. I think God works in all sorts of ways to bring people together. Of course, HE uses the Internet now because it is such a big part of our lives. I am all for online dating. It is a safe and easy way to meet pepole that you might not usually get to meet in your every day life. God works in mysterious ways. 🙂 That’s my two cents.

    1. WOW Margo, that’s a great testimony for the validity of online dating. I think it is fully the same as any other way of meeting people. It’s just that no matter how tech-savvy we are, it still feels new to think about “dating” online. But I do like the idea that there is probably deeper and more real communication not steeped in vanity and appearances.

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