In Hopeful Anticipation


I know that this site generally discusses lies.  But death is a reality, the final truth of life.  My granddad died on Wednesday morning.  His memorial service is tomorrow.  I wrestled violently with what I should do – go home? when? stay here? Finally, per my Heavenly Father’s leading and my mother’s graceful confirmation, I decided to stay here in VA instead of flying home to Oklahoma for the service.

As I prayed for wisdom on this decision, I journaled my prayer.  What came from my pen was a letter to Granddad, about two days before he died.  How comforting to KNOW that our loved ones know Jesus and are suddenly more alive than we are!

In Granddad’s memory and hopeful anticipation:

Dear Granddad,

I wonder what you’re seeing right now?

Have you closed earth’s eyelids and already glimpsed the face of Jesus?

 

When they say that to live will never be the same,

“How right they are,” you must be thinking!  “I never yet have lived!”

 

As you gripped the strong hand of Jesus

And he pulled you past earth’s clouds,

You might have turned and waved goodbye, uttered half a sigh.

In a moment’s years we too will know the real life that you see

And wonder why we wept down here and cried impotently.

 

I believe the grass is more verdant where you stand

And waterfalls shout acclamations of joy.

Earth’s been silent far too long

And you’re first to applaud heaven’s chorus.

 

To be honest, down here, I wrestle with protocol.

How best to mourn, how to comfort,

And yet how much is necessary?

Do you appreciate our tears?

 

I imagine you are already so enraptured in new-life, real-life,

That you may not even notice our sadness.

 

I don’t believe you’ve died.

I believe that you have proven that REAL life runs parallel to our petty shroud.

 

Perhaps like David, you’ve shad your raiment.

You are cloaked only in ballad of worship.

Granddad, dance, dance with all your might.

7 thoughts on “In Hopeful Anticipation

  1. Abs! I’m so sorry!!!! I completely understand you trying to decide if you would go to the funeral or not. I did the same when my grandmother died. It was so hard! I was very uneasy about going but couldn’t place it…and I remember my dad calling and telling me to stay. It was such a relief to me! Praying for your family!

  2. Thanks Beth, I really helps to realize that someone else has made that tough decision. I was in the same boat – I felt like the “right” thing to do was go, but I didn’t feel “right” about it personally. Maybe I’ll never know why, but I’m glad that I obeyed the Holy Spirit.

    1. Hello Friend! Thank you for the condolences. I’m really praying for my grandma, now. My mom is staying with her for a while, but longterm plans will be hard. How are you?

  3. Abby, It’s nice to think about what your granddad might be experiencing right now. He is in a better place but will be greatly missed especially by your grandmother. Death is always sad, but as Christians, it’s just another step towards what God has planned for us and that is a comforting thought. Thank you for sharing the letter to your granddad. Julie

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