LASTing Peace, Week 15, Not a Screw Up

The official title of my book is, The Predatory Lies of Anorexia: A Survivor’s Story. The ebook is available on Amazon now, the link is below and the print edition will be out in March! Please contact me about speaking at your school, church, Bible study group or special event. I look forward to meeting you.

The Predatory Lies of Anorexia: A Survivor’s Story

There’s a new press release out about my book!

Abby Kelly’s new book Surviving the Predatory Lies of Anorexia has just been released in an ebook format, by well renowned international lecture and counsellor Bettie Youngs publishing company, Bettie Youngs Books.

In this book Abby reveals her compelling story and battle with overcoming Anorexia. She describes the root causes to her illness, and shares extracts from her journals. Her family members will also inform what it was like for them to see her suffering with this disorder.

Read the rest here…

“Surviving the Predatory Lies of Anorexia” is HERE

my book

It’s the holidays, brutal times for any family plagued by an eating disorder. This book will be an encouraging and enlightening read for anyone seeking understanding of this disorder and light at the end of the tunnel.

Click through to view it on Amazon. Below are a number of other ebook formats where you can purchase it.

https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/389934

New Book! “Surviving the Predatory Lies of Anorexia”

book 2

Dear Friends, I am thrilled to announce that my book, Surviving the Predatory Lies of Anorexia, will be available in ebook on all formats in January! Bettie Youngs Book Publishers will be publishing my book and stay tuned, the print copy will be available soon as well!

I’m so honored to share this review of, Surviving the Predatory Lies of Anorexia, by Ramsey Coutta.

Everyone has needs and wants, but imagine if yours are so deep and so strong that they lead you to self-destructive behaviors that imperil your very life. Imagine that in your profound need to be noticed, admired, and loved, you literally starve your body of the nourishment it needs to survive and thrive. Sadly, such is often the life of those afflicted with anorexia.

In her compelling new book, Surviving the Predatory Lies of Anorexia, Abigail Kelly courageously lays bare her personal struggle with anorexia and the heavy toll it has taken on her life and those closest to her. She does not flinch from sharing with the reader how anorexia magnified her natural flaws causing her to act in ways that will seem inconceivable to those not familiar with this disorder.

Kelly insightfully reveals that her lifelong battle with anorexia is more than just a human battle against mental illness; at its core it’s an ongoing spiritual battle, a theme which she skillfully weaves in and out of her story. At one turning point on her road to recovery she acknowledges the power of God to strengthen her against the force of anorexia, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Philippians 4:13…It was the only truth I actually believed. The road ahead was long; my ambition to stay well, still shaky. But I knew that Christ was in me. I knew that He was going to have to do this because I still wasn’t sure I wanted to.”

Surviving the Predatory Lies of Anorexia, spans a significant portion of Kelly’s life from when she was a teenager to the present as a grown woman married to a career military officer. She details the beginnings of her experience with anorexia and how as a teen it started as a personal choice in order to appear thin and desirable as well as a way to compete for the attention she longed for. Eventually though, the anorexia took on a life of its own to the point she was no longer able to control it, even during the rare moments she actually wanted to do so.

Repeated stays at inpatient facilities and ongoing therapy with counselors brought periods of insight and healing, but inevitably relapses occurred leaving Kelly and her family feeling desperate and defeated.

Marriage brings Kelly a sense of purpose and fulfillment on one hand, but on the other she experiences intense feelings of loneliness and searching. At one point, throwing herself into long distance running she once again finds the demons of her illness rising up causing her to grow thinner and thinner greatly worrying friends and family.

The illness of anorexia along with the stress of repeated moves and deployments from her husband’s career eventually bring their relationship to the point of collapse. However, God is always present in Kelly’s narrative and it’s through His power that the couple are able to face their adversities together.

Surviving the Predatory Lies of Anorexia, is a compelling true life story of ever shifting hope and despair in the life of an amazing woman. The reader will simply shake their head and wonder at how one person can go though such a tremendously long and painful struggle and still come out so hopeful and determined. The redeeming power of God’s love and grace is never far away in Kelly’s saga. Those who read her book will come away feeling inspired and better as a person for having been introduced to the life of this extraordinary woman and author.

This review was graciously written by the founder and editor of Believer Life, Ramsey Coutta.  Ramsey is a successful author in his own right and has many books available on Amazon. I will be posting an interview with Coutta in the coming weeks.

Artist Unchained

As a writer, I like to try on the title of “artist”. It sounds so free-spirited, edgy and unpredictable. It makes me feel colorful, unique and it frames my sheer looney-ness as something more respectable. But alas, I’m kind of a rule follower.

As a freed anorexic (a more appropriate term than “recovered” as it denotes the truth that I had nothing to do with it, and the fact that anorexia was indeed a harsh master), I have been practicing restraint in my physical exercise habits for years. Since over exercising was one of my eating disordered vices, health for me looks like moderation and sometimes abstinence.

Unfortunately, that doesn’t mean I don’t worry about exercise often, and stress about how much I should do, what I should do, if I’m doing enough and what workout will produce the best results. Thank God, He has protected me from myself and kept me from acting out on any of these fears. But I don’t want to just be physically healthy.

I want to experience complete freedom from anorexic fears. I want to be free from thoughts like, “I have to exercise this much. I am not allowed to eat those things, or at those times, or in these places.”

Come to think of it, my eating disorder was nothing less than a list of rules. Put that way, it seems ironic that I seek freedom by asking God to give me another set of rules. Rules and regulations have a certain appeal. They call to us with the promise of a secured outcome. If we follow these rules, we will get these guaranteed results.

At one time it was, “If I follow these rules with my diet and exercise, I will have the body I want.” Recovery offered me the possibility of real freedom; freedom to experience my body as God’s beautiful art, to indulge in creativity and spontaneity. Or, I could try to harness recovery and manage it by a list of rules. “If I do certain things, then I will not be an anorexic, but I also won’t get fat.”

The Bible says the mind set on the Spirit is life and peace. In Isaiah, we’re told that God keeps in perfect peace the one whose mind is set on Him. And we also learn to take our thoughts captive to Christ – not be captivated by them.

My mental merry-go-round has been in overdrive for the past couple days. As I walked the dog this morning, I brought those thoughts in chains to my Father.

“Lord, I want to be completely obsessed with you. I know that’s impossible as long as my heart is divided and distracted by so many thoughts of exercise. Please, please free my mind.

“It would be easiest, Lord, if you would just tell me what to do. Can you give me a rule book? How about something like: I should never run more than so many miles, only do bodyweight workouts, follow a certain program for a certain number of days, etc. Can you just lay it all out there for me?”

Abba didn’t answer the way I thought He would. Instead, He took my mind through a maze of reasoning based on Scripture, that led me to a place of peace, however not at all a place like I had imagined.

“Daughter, Why do you ask for rules? You want to know what’s safe and predictable. You want to know what you should do in order to achieve those things that you believe will make you happiest. 

Your body is not a means to an end. Your body is a means to me. I have given you a body to fully experience the joy of relationship with me and with others. Of what good is all your exercise if it does not bring you joy and it is not achieving an end that I require of you? You have no need for all those things such as flat abs and thin thighs, and manipulating your body to obtain them does not bring you joy. Why then are you doing them?

I will not give a list of rules because I want you to discover what brings you joy. What about arms reaching, legs stretching, toes wiggling, lungs swelling, heart pounding? What of those things brings you joy?

Since the dawn of Grace, the gift of eternal life though my Son Jesus, man has searched high and low for a rule book, a law, to guide him into my favor. It does not exist. My grace covers even your workouts. 

Move in freedom. 

Rest in peace. 

Do not demand a list of rules that does not exist. 

Do not demand a law that has been fulfilled. 

Yesterday is gone, 

Tomorrow may never come. 

This is the day that I have made. 

Rejoice and be glad in it. 

 

Question: Do you follow a list of rules for your workouts and diet? Why? What if you threw them to the wind? What, if anything, is good about having rules to follow?

Excerpt from “Almost Nothing” (recent addition) :)

In his book, The Purpose Driven Life, Rick Warren says, “The purpose of your life is far greater than your own personal fulfillment, your peace of mind, or even your happiness (and I might add, your health). It’s far greater than your family, your career, or even your wildest dreams and ambitions.”

I have discovered, in my own walk toward complete freedom from anorexia, that true recovery wasn’t so much about me, my issues, my family, my illness, my health, my fitness, my bone density, my depression, my happiness, my weight or even my future, but true freedom was found only by looking away from myself, upward to my Savior and outward toward those He has called me to love. 

“I lift up my eyes to the hills. From where does my help come? My help comes from the LORD, who made heaven and earth.” Ps. 121:1-2

Purpose Driven Life